On Fear

Photo from mwangi gatheca

What is Fear?

Fear is a lot like fire. Just as fire pops out, makes us freeze, unable to think for a moment, and take us to a fight-or-flight circumstance, fear does the same thing. When fire is out of control, it is destructive. Learn how to use it, and you can change the course of the civilization with fire. At least, that’s what our ancestors did. Harnessing fire made a human civilization, and harnessing fear can change the course of your destiny as well.

What happens when you fear?

James Powell, serving in the Marine Corps, and wanted to join the CIA. He decided to try out, and pretty soon he found himself sitting in a waiting room waiting for his interview. He looked left and right, and pretty much understood he was surrounded by Navy SEALs, Green Berets, and people with degrees from Harvard, Yale and Stanford — he felt that gut wrenching feeling of fear in his bowel.

What am I doing here? He asked himself “the question”. we have all felt this in our life.

The woman at the reception looked at him, “Are you doing okay? You kind of look nervous there”, she asked.

“Honestly,”John replies, “I don’t know if my resume stacks up with the other people here,” indirectly pointing at the others.

The Woman didn’t even turn. She replied, “Look, if you are in this room, then there must be a reason that you are in this room.”

Just what James needed to hear. Hearing the comment from the woman flipped a mental switch in his head at that moment.

A few minutes later he was inside, acing his interview, went on a solid career in CIA from there.

What does fear do?

Fear is not something to fight, it is something to embrace. As evolutionary being, fear is the sense of something might be wrong, or an awareness of potential danger. We want to live a full life, and fear awards us the proper emotion to save ourself at any cost. But what do we fear these days? Do we fear night predators? Lions? Tigers? that they will eat us away when we are not looking?

In modern times, the fear is an unpaid bill. A difficult conversation. An important meeting a head. A business deal. An important exam. And just like a predator shark back in the days; these swim in and around our head everyday.

The Mental Model to overcome fear?

Mastering fear is not about becoming physically stronger anymore. Nor it is becoming more macho, aggressive or more pumped up.

Mastering fear is mastering your self-talk.

It is about learning how to identify and change the conversation that appears in your head when you fear something. The mental model for overcoming fear is:

Think and Talk Positive to Overcome Fear.

The goal is not to eliminate the fear. You can’t make the fear go away. But Overcoming fears is just killing your negativity about the fear. Your sense of defeat. Think and talk positive and you will overcome your fear.

Is Overcoming fear that simple?

Mastering the art of self-talk is one of the most important skill in 21st century. Knowledge and skill are in abundance, but people inevitably fall into anxiety when they try to implement it as a person.

If you study the biographies of great men and women, and you find that people who accomplish great things in life typically do so not by denying or beating back their fears; but by embracing them.

Professional singers, dancers, performers, businessmen will tell you, they live for that nervousness they feel, that pinch of anxiety. Because when they do feel the pumps sweating, they know they are onto something; something bigger than life.

Becoming aware of that fear and mastering the inner self-talk to think positive is what flips the fear switch in their head.

Step up on overcoming fear:

Overcoming fear is killing your negativity. Therefore, replace it with the positive energy within you and do it anyway. Doing it will change the course of your life.

Next time you experience a true fear or anxiety about something, don’t waste your money, energy or time evading it. Instead use it, embrace it and make it your ally by thinking and talking positive. The fear comes in relation to your own worth.

Remember,

The bigger the fear, the bigger you have become.

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Reading, writing, listening and speaking all about human behavior. Reach me at kamaltouhid@gmail.com

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Touhid Kamal

Touhid Kamal

Reading, writing, listening and speaking all about human behavior. Reach me at kamaltouhid@gmail.com

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